Wednesday 10 April 2013

you can't go



it nearly gave way – the in-ground trampoline
when with my hands I turned your head, weightless
with willing, like an orb of dew encased in curls and skin
towards a distant mob of kangaroos, your first
and you leapt and your English flew off in the sparks –
when with my hands I held onto the springs
after falling, and morning reigned so kingly in my stomach –

who was it then that covered your eyes
blue as a kitten’s, with cardboard, spun you and spun you
sick and sat you spinning beneath the sunrise
a molten marshmallow oozing over a rockslide –
was the cardboard waxed – my French too crude to ask
but what you smelt, what you tasted folded through my thoughts
like the whitest meringue through fast-deflating dough –

the first of the barbed wire fences, that’s where the roos
had bounded to from the high grass in the valley – the valley
that seemed to stretch, at least, from St Andrews to Eltham
and, your sight rescued, your share of the world again
unmoving, they looked at you, all seven Big Reds –
nonplussed, as though you’d asked a difficult question of them
and you looked back, fingernails scraping the heavy nylon, and shook –

meantime, Sean killed the turntables for dawn
and after a moment of screeching static, the speakers too –
only the fires, loud and lambent in their oil drums
and the birds and the far-off rustle of Yarra rapids
and the ringing of ears could be heard – but how would you have known?
now cross-legged, a well-fed and gorgeous yogi
un-ironed clothes so windless as to look like warped plastic



your mouth so agape you couldn’t help but yawn –
half in terror, half in thrall – how would you have known
                  about anything at all except that light-
refracting animism
                                         – union of souls, let’s say –
and how could you go back to Europe now?

could you be anywhere but where the roos are and call it living?
It’s not a question you’ll ever ask yourself.
But, asleep in the car as it teases out the hills, I could swear
you flinched when I said, as if to a piece of silk gauze on a spurting wound
you can’t go.                                            





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